How many times have we rushed into starting a new relationship only because our initial conversations and interactions were fun and sparked those lost butterfly feelings again? Rushing into a relationship is the simple part of any relationship; getting to fully know a person before committing to getting into one is the more difficult part.
Been there and done that.
Conversations were so fun, physical attraction was flamin’ hot; it was all smiles and laughs. Then a few weeks down the road, we consciously unconsciously were in a committed relationship.
All the butterflies and feelings that were once lost were there, again.
Some people hate the idea of being single, which in return makes them eagerly be searching to find the one. That person who will magically come into their life and add something they’re missing, make them feel better and more secure because now they have the one to rely on.
After a few failed relationships, I learned to take things slower than usual and trust the process of taking the time to get to know someone fully before deciding to get into a committed relationship. Because let’s be honest, finding good, decent, and honest people is difficult, but keeping a good and healthy relationship is even more so.
But what’s a decent amount of time to be ready and get into a relationship? I’m not sure, but I’m sure it’s not a few days or weeks after meeting and knowing this person. To be honest, there is actually no perfect timing, but I think getting a better idea of what and how he or she is like can provide a better picture of whether you really want to be in a relationship with this person… but you do you.
Let things flow. If it is, it will be.
From what I’ve learned, I’m just trying to make sure I’m past the infatuation period. I’m trying to spend a fair amount of time knowing this person as a friend, hanging out with our social groups, and doing activities that are important to us and see how we both are during different circumstances.
It’s like figuring out the Escape Room in a sense.
Are there any red flags after spending this time doing things together? Do I still see this person as my possible long-term partner? Do I still have all the initial butterflies and feelings for her? Can I accept the bad parts and work together to improve them?
Relationships are often complexed because it involves two human beings, but our job as partners is to make it more enjoyable.
There are things to question and questions to think about before getting into a relationship. But who am I to tell you what to do? I can only do what I’ve learned from my previous relationships and take these learnings to build a better relationship next time, with the one.